A little girl or a grown up mum?
How are you? How was the week for you? I am good, some moments of bliss and some moments of absolute nightmare. Well that’s life, isn’t it? Celebrating the moments of joy and surviving those moments of despair. Yesterday night, I was talking to my brother over phone and I heard my mum in the background. I heard my mum calling him for dinner. For a moment, I felt like joining them. For a moment, I missed being the little girl. For a moment, I missed being fondly called for dinner. Remember the days? And for a moment I forgot that I was a grown up mum! Until my kids called me with the same sound, you know that familiar two notes higher sound ‘Mummy’, I was still wondering on the cross over from a daughter to a mum. Just like the corridor that takes you from your flight to the airport, you keep walking and reach somewhere bright without even realising it. The transition just happens and you reach tip-toed, somewhere that looks like the place to be. I am talking about the transitions of becoming a mum and it’s astounding!
Suddenly you start eating those vegetables. I remember as a child, I just wouldn’t eat vegetables. But now, I have become the enlightened one. I tell them how good and nutritious those green things are!
All of a sudden, time keeping is not a problem. From waking up to waking the kids up, you have come a long way :-). You now know that there is something called ‘waste of time’. You realise the harmful effects of ‘too’. Too much television, too much play (too much screen). You have realised that homework and projects are not meant for Sunday evenings or Sunday night. Remember you are the same person but the transition is remarkable.
Patience. Well some things never change. I try my best.
Sometimes, when my son in the name of doing homework, stares intently at the pencil and somehow get lost in the charm of the mysterious pencil, I can hear a big ‘Kaching’ sound in my mind. It says ‘have done that’! But being a mum, I do try to be a bit sarcastic and tell him to keep staring because the homework is going to be finished with that gaze. In the hindsight, I am completely with him (in that intense look), admiring the mysteries of the pencil.
I used to have my best ideas during the study leave. I have destroyed so many of my (oh so great) ideas with ‘if at all I had the time’. I have to remember that because there is a high probability that my kids would do the same. Those moments of looking at the walls and ceiling and dreaming incessantly!
Days of wonderment, non stop chatter and complete chaos – they never cease to exist. Because you relive them in your own cryptic ways. And the best part is ‘you can be that little girl’ whenever you want to. That period of going back through that corridor was brief but it was so much fun. I hope you too enjoyed the trip along !